Our youngest recently started wearing glasses. As someone who is non-verbal, it can be tough to find out that they have a need that’s not being met. I’d like to walk you through the process of how we found out that he needed glasses, and how we got him wearing them. Especially since change is not something people on the spectrum like.
Reason for the Glasses
Previously, we had always had eye exams done at school, so he was in a familiar environment. Our youngest is non-verbal, which meant his exams at school came back with inconclusive results. And on this day, he had not been cooperating that day, and so they told us we needed to take him to a eye doctor, as his non-compliance might be because his eye sight wasn’t what it needed to be.
Further more, our son is scheduled for his three year re-eval at the school later this year. The school was insisting that they wanted conclusive information to ensure his vision wasn’t limiting his abilities, not him being autistic (I swear I wanted to laugh at this – but I was good and didn’t). Therefore, they requested that we have further external testing.
Thus we began our search for an eye doctor with experience working with non-verbal autistic children. The closest one we found was about an hour away, but knowing how important this was, we booked an appointment.
The appointment took a while since they tried normal testing procedures first having him read the letters off of a line. Surprise, surprise, that didn’t work with someone who is non-verbal.
Next, they administered a different test. This test watched his eye movement through a machine. He had to keep his head still the entire time, first for one eye and then the other. Our little guy did pretty well, only slightly moving a few times. However, they were able to get enough data from this to make a diagnosis.
From this test, we could find that not only did he need glasses, but that his eyesight was fairly bad. Our son is nearsighted, which meant he could see things up close, which is why we didn’t know there was a problem. Coloring, playing with a tablet, or game pieces near him was no problem. Looking across the room however way. And yes, we felt guilty, but without him being able to tell us, it was hard to know. He doesn’t run into things around the house, and he could work with toys and utensils up close, so there was just no way of knowing.
Picking the Right Glasses
It was tough picking glasses for our kiddo, since he really couldn’t tell us what he liked. We tried several on him to see what looked like they fit the best while watching him to make sure he didn’t dislike them. He had no issue putting on any of the frames. This might be because my husband wears glasses, and so he sees it as normal.
When picking out the frames, there were a few things we knew we wanted. One was something lightweight, so he doesn’t think about wearing them. Second, one that is strong. Luckily, frames, especially for kids, are much more resilient than they were when I was his age. Finally, we wanted something that fit his style.
We found a pair that was lightweight and flexible that fit his face well. The one we selected had a flexible nose pad. We decided that getting glasses that fit better outweighed the chances of him breaking the nose pads.
Waiting for his New Glasses to Arrive
While we were waiting for new glasses, which was about two weeks, we started working on getting him used to glasses. I got my eyes tested at the same time as my son, and found out I needed reading glasses.
So I got a pair of reading glasses for myself and started wearing them when working at my computer so he could see me wearing them. His father always wears glasses, so there was no change there, and even his teacher at school also starting wearing her glasses instead of contacts.
I put sunglasses on him occasionally so he could get used to the feeling of wearing glasses. Since he didn’t seem to have an issue with these, we figured we would have a good chance of him wearing his glasses without taking them off.
Learning to Wear His Glasses
Change is always a big deal for our kiddos. When we got the glasses in, they came in a hard shell case. That was a big deal for us, as we knew we could put them in a backpack, and it wouldn’t probably break the glasses.
Since I don’t normally wear glasses, my mother-in-law, and my husband, both told me about “breaking in” the new glasses. Even though glasses will help us, our eyes are used to forcing us to focus to try to see things. Now they have to not do it, but out of habit, they keep trying. Wearing new glasses, even getting a slight change in prescription, can cause you to have nasty headaches and even make you feel nauseous they told me.
We realized he would need time to get used to wearing them, so we built him up slowly. At first we had him wear his glasses for only about 10 minutes. We would try to do this a few times a day to help him adjust. For the first few days, he was happy to take them off. After a couple of days, we extended this time period, as he seemed to be able to tolerate wearing them the whole time.
Next, we upped it to 30 minutes straight at home and 30 minutes a day at school. We allowed him to take them off earlier if he wanted. We were there with him the whole time to help him. That way he didn’t take the glasses off and lose them, or put them down where someone might sit on them, or break them in other ways.
We kept his case in his backpack’s outside pocket. That way, it was always in the same place, whether he was at school or home. This reduces the chances of him losing them, and protects them at the same time. This is especially important as glasses can be expensive to buy!
After a few days, we just let him keep them on and take them off when he didn’t want to wear them anymore. Now, less than a month later, he wears them almost all day long. In fact, since he basically forgets he has them on, we have to be careful he removes them before going to bed.
Summery
For almost 10 years, we never knew he needed glasses. But as we learned, there are ways to find out if your child needs vision correction, and they can be helped with it. Our son has made a lot of progress this school year, and we believe that this may be a part of the reason for that improvement.
Hopefully, this information can help you with your own child, should you need to go through this with them.
